And this month went where?

Jeepers. It seems like we had just gotten into March. And now here we are. April on the doorstep. Tax season looming. The normal cycle of depression setting in...

I think it is only natural when one expends a great deal of energy on a high, thoroughly enjoying the company of others, that the flip side of the coin awaits. The low. The feeling of tiredness. The sense that perhaps it is 'too much' and that perhaps there is a need to withdraw and regroup. Or a compulsion to return to the life one led before. A bit solitary, a bit apart, and a great deal lonely. Well, maybe that is the way it is. And one just has to cope.
Work is returning slightly to the epic proportions of insanity experienced just about a year ago. When one was on the complete verge of burnout. Seems like we are experiencing it in a different manner this time round, but then what are the sayings? 'Hindsight is 20/20, and experience makes us all the wiser'?
It will be the same screaming. The same looming deadlines. The same amount of intense pressure and dissection of every little mis-step, and error. The same grilling over not having a contingency in place to account for every possible problem that may or may not happen. This is work. It doesn't change. Ever. And it doesn't matter where you are. The ratios of the formula might adjust slightly, but overall it is the same darn recipe. There is no getting away from this. On the other hand, there is a sense of slight satisfaction that in all the craziness, we've learned a lesson or two from the first go-round, and are slightly (I really emphasize the term slightly) better prepared for it now. Perhaps the hide is thickening. Not quite at the number of layers that the great Rhino might have, but a few more than the delicate eggshell we possesed only recently. Some would view this as a positive change. An adaptation for better survival in the business clime. I view this partly as worrisome. Gaining more layers, more thickness, means a change in one's personality. A new wall has gone up (or rather a thin one that previously existed has thickened). Does this mean that fundamental character core has changed? I don't know. Do I relate to others differently, am I more insensitive (with a higher tendency to brush off the cares of others)? You see what I mean. I have long thought that to change and adapt to suit the most ruthless climate of the workplace requires sacrifice, and a large one at that. And what is one getting in return? Is the monetary value and all that it affords (among the enjoyment) enough for the sacrifice that must be made. Again, I'm not sure.
But enough about work.
Life has been interesting as well. What we manage to carve out of it. There has been a good deal of local travel. Visits from friends, and the return of a great. All welcome things. And all a breath of fresh air.
Remembering to live again and count the roses, or the bricks, or the cat hairs that are littering one's pants. The tribe have been active and very churlish of late. Our carpet continues to be assaulted on a daily basis and eaten away. Accelerating project 'hardwood floor install' by a good 3 months. Bad kitties.
But we love them so.
Next project is the compilation of the 'Worst 10 drinks'. I think I finally have the cornerstones that will anchor this list. And there are quite a few!

Comments

[Ginny Weasley]

Ah, perhaps the thickening of the hide is an increase in self-confidence? One doesn't have to become a bastard to deal with bastards and frankly, Herm-ee-oh-ninny, I do not see you ever becoming a bastard. Not caring for the concerns of others? Bollocks! You are one of the most - if not THE - most caring and concerned people I know. Stop bashing yourself or I will come up there and bash you over the head with a stuffed animal. I am at The Burrow right now, preparing to make Easter dinner tomorrow. Apricot glazed Cornish Game Hens with wild rice, pecan, pear, blue cheese salad, and a homemade version of the greatest cake that has ever been made, the Miss Grace Lemon Cake. Never have I had such a lemony lemon cake. Turns out they use lemonade concentrate in the mix! Aha! If it comes out well, I'll bring one up next time I see you, which I hope will not be long!

Love,
Ginny.